The East Terrace Predicts Round Two of the Six Nations
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Action from the Amstrad 464 |
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International Rugby Simulator
Format: Amstrad 464
Publisher: Codemasters
After utilising the power of the Super Nintendo for our first week or predictions, we decided to harness the awesome computing power of the Amstrad 464 for Round Two of the Six Nations.
Having determined the operating system we would use, we then had to choose our software. We plumped for 1988's International Rugby Simulator from Codemasters on tape cassette format. We were confident this could help us get things right. After all, someone who has been following or playing rugby for many years tends to be more perceptive when it comes to analysing rugby. Therefore, why shouldn't an old game program be even wiser than a current one? Computer programs are brilliant.
Potential flaws with the program
Ironically, although the game was made in the 1980s, the Amstrad version for some reason awards five points for a try (it was four at time of programming). The Spectrum and Commodore versions gave the correct point value of four points for a try. For this reason we opted for the Amstrad version of the game in our test, it means we don't have to adjust our calculations.
A possible major flaw in our prediction may be in the fact that the game uses eight players per team, rather than fifteen. Also, each player is the game has the same appearance, speed, height, power, skills and abilities as every other player.
Furthermore, like a throwback to the 1970s, wingers in International Rugby Simulator throw the ball in at the lineout. But rather than using a blindside winger, the teams use their openside winger and leave a big enough gap for five Os du Randts to plough through.
Finally, there is no option to play as either Wales or Italy. Whilst the exclusion of an Italian team in a 1980s rugby game may not be too unusual, for some reason the Codemasters programmers of the 1980s saw fit to include West Germany, East Germany and Russia instead of a Welsh team. These rugby powerhouses were included despite a picture of Gareth Edwards being the loading image for the game and Wales finishing third in the world cup in 1987. There is an option to change team names, but we wanted to minimise human interference for the sake of accuracy.
Therefore, we picked Russia to represent Italy and West Germany to represent Wales.
France v Ireland
If you never played the Amstrad version of International Rugby Simulator, you cannot possibly grasp the concept of how slow it is. Each player travels at the same speed and it takes about twenty seconds to run the length of the field. For that reason, The East Terrace tried its best to stay awake watching these simulations and this is a short summary of what we kept our eyes open for:
The French dominate an otherwise dull game and spend most of the time camped in the Irish half. We were so bored we don't want to talk about it too much. Players ran into each other, they tackle standing up, and then the ball goes flying, usually backwards where it all happens again.
With forty five seconds remaining of the game, and neither team on the score sheet, France steal a loose pass from an Irish maul to score a breakaway try near the posts. We think it was a forward who scored, but everyone looks the same so we can't tell. The conversion is added and the ball flies about one hundred meters over the posts into a huge field which has a stand running alongside it; just a continuation of the main touchline stand. It is filled with thousands of digital spectators who must have been digitally shafted by digitally shelling out for the worse seats in the digital universe.
Amazingly, after being nil-nil for almost the whole game before the French score, the Irish respond straight from the kick off after gathering a loose ball and charging for the line. Then, in a shocking refereeing decision, the match official blows for full-time as Ireland are crossing the goal line. The final score is confirmed as 7-0 to France. Bizarrely, for reasons unknown, the referee then awards the try after the game has ended and the score suddenly changes to 7-5. However, the Irish are not given a chance to take the conversion to tie the match. As if that wasn't bizarre enough, the game then kicks off for a third half and Ireland are given a brief second, or rather third, chance to win. But as soon as this 'third half' begins the game crashes and everything grinds to a halt.
Final score: France 7 Ireland 5
Russia (Italy) v England
Russia, proudly representing Italy, start the game with a try that is exactly - and we mean exactly - the same as the one Ireland scored at the end of their fixture. It is a simply a long kick off that is spilled by the receiving team and pounced on by the Russians. As every player runs the same speed, once the Russian forward grabs the ball it is just a matter of time before he scores. The simple conversion is missed and Russia have to settle for five a five-point lead.
Then, from the kick off, England does exactly - and we mean exactly - the same kick/recover/score thing as Russia just had (which also was exactly the same thing Ireland did) and get a try. The English, however, add the conversion. The score is 7-5 to England after just thirty seconds. Hmm.
The rest of the half is a mind numbingly dumb with no player seeming to be able to make more than three yards (and that slowly). Finally, after a pathetic drop goal attempt, Russia score from another turnover and take the lead. They make the conversion this time.
The second half is so mind-numbingly dumb we can't even bring ourselves to type about it. Suffice to say, nobody scored. England's virtual grand slam is in tatters as the Russians shock the world.
Final score: Russia (Italy) 10 England 7
West Germany (Wales) v Scotland
By the time The East Terrace analysis team began working on the Welsh/Scottish game, International Rugby Simulator was getting quite painful to watch. So, to be honest with you, we halved the playing time of this game as we felt like crying we were so bored. And, believe it or not, the kick off of this game was exactly the same in every single detail as the last game: kick off, dropped ball, home team score in the corner. Like the last game the conversion is missed and the away team scores a converted try straight from the kick off. So after thirty seconds the score is 7-5 to Scotland. Blah, blah.
The game continues to be an exact replica of the previous one for the rest of the half; with the home team missing a sitter of a drop goal and scoring an unconverted try. The East Terrace is slightly suspicious that this simulation will not exactly provide the most accurate sample in our analysis experiment. The East Terrace also had the feeling this game will produce the exact result the previous one did as, to that point, it has been identical down to every ruck, maul and kick as the Russia (Italy)/England game.
However, there is a slight deviation as the West Germans break through for a certain try moments before the game is due to end. Once again, as in the France/Ireland match, the referee blows for full time in the middle of open play and the try is not scored. International Rugby Simulator then attempts to once again kick off for part three, but we are damned if we are gonna sit through that again! We switch it off.
Final score: West Germany (Wales) 10 Scotland 7
Round Two Results
France 7 Ireland 5
Russia 10 England 7
West Germany 10 Scotland 7
Potential problems with our computer system
The East Terrace does admit slight concern with the results forecast by International Rugby Simulator. We also feel like crying we were so bored.
So what should you bet on for the Round Two of the Six Nations?
Well, they certainly don't make them like they used to. Thank god. If you are a complete fool you could bet on Russia and West Germany filling in on the weekend as Italy and Wales are banned for mass positive drug tests or something, but we wouldn't recommend it.
However, giving the old computer the benefit of doubt, it may be worth betting a few points on Italy to sneak home by three. Just for the fun of it, like. Otherwise, we are at a complete loss at what to make of these results. Maybe we just can't read the signs.
How does our prediction table look?
| P | W | D | L | F | A | Pt | |
| France | 2 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 17 | 12 | 4 |
| England | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 50 | 10 | 2 |
| Ireland | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 19 | 7 | 2 |
| Italy/Russia | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 21 | 2 |
| Wales/West Germany | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 50 | 2 |
| Scotland | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 14 | 20 | 0 |
Check back next week to see how The East Terrace fared with betting on some of the predictions we forecast.
If you have any experience with International Rugby Simulator, or want to comment on our predictions, please email us at webmaster@theeastterrace.com